I am the grit in the gears, the missing bolt, I am the poker of sticks into spokes.
I like to know how things work, but sometimes when I take them apart and rebuild them, I have a few pieces left over.
I am a man, so I tend to leave reading the instructions until after it goes wrong.
And like all men I have a comprehensive mental map of the world and never need to ask directions.
I never get lost, only sometimes I'm late, or end up in the wrong place entirely.
It's what we do.
Thursday, 21 August 2008
Further Developments on the Subject of the Thripp-Curmudgeonly Orgasmatron
See HERE for background on the original post. "Richard X. Thripp said... Ha ha, looks like a powerful weapon."
Thank god! I had lost all hope of finding you.... It's a long shot, I know, but I'm hoping you know the whereabouts of your great-grandfather's secret journals. They were, it is rumoured, so secret, he used to blindfold himself whilst writing in them... and would not tell himself where they were hidden. It is rumoured that back in the early days, he designed a counter-surge device, but never found a purpose for it. That purpose, of course, did not then exist, as in those days he had yet to collaborate with the late Sir Randolph Curmudgeonly on the early prototype Orgasmatron. We have a problem. A serious problem. The new orgasmatron is a modern device, built to be a close facsimile of their mark VI,( the one which was destroyed in a fit of jealousy by Grand-Duke Sigismund, after Duchess Cecilie giggled non-stop for a whole month, following her visit to the laboratory). Unfortunately, we have had substitute some materials, I think the substitution is at the um... nub.. of the problem. Surges! uncontrollable surges in the vaccilator coils of the main reciprocal thrimbobulator. -Cecilie may have taken a month to regain her composure, but some of our test subjects may never come down... One shouts "YES, YES, YES, YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!" continuously, another just smiles and hums all the time. I think it is all due to the ridged turbulants on the thrum capacitors having been made of baekelite, when the original papers stated "unicorn ivory" as the material. It being now illegal to trade in even ancient unicorn parts, I just can't find the tiny amount I would need, no matter how far afield I search... I need to see if old Thripp ever tried any other materials, and if so, whether any currently available to me might give a safe result. Failing that, I need, desperately, his most powerful surge-damper. Like... yesterday. Please.